About the Relationships category

For the hard parts of being with someone — repeated arguments, lost trust, and knowing whether to stay. Honest support without taking sides.

Most relationship difficulty isn’t dramatic. It’s the same argument for the fourth year running, or a slow drift you can’t quite name, or the accumulated weight of small things you stopped mentioning.

This category is for talking that through with people who aren’t your friends or family, and who have no stake in the outcome.

What people talk about here

Something being off without being able to explain it. The same fight on repeat, and what’s actually underneath it. Rebuilding trust after it’s been broken, and whether that’s possible. Mismatched intimacy, effort, or ambition. In-laws, money, and division of labour. Long distance. Deciding whether to leave, and the long ambivalent period before anyone decides anything. Being single and wanting not to be. And the ordinary maintenance of something that’s basically working.

Related categories

Support beyond the forum

If you’re frightened of your partner, being monitored or controlled, or told everything is your fault — that’s abuse rather than a difficult relationship. 1800RESPECT can help confidentially on 1800 737 732, and our Domestic Violence category may be a better fit.

How to use this category

You’ll only ever hear one side here, so replies should be careful about verdicts. “Leave them” is easy to type and rarely useful to someone actually living it.

Please don’t name your partner or post identifying details, and don’t post their messages or photos. Describe what’s happening instead.